[open text to all]

[peacefulexplorer]

Hi. I don't usually send open messages but frankly at this point i've run out of options

knowing how things go this is probably the rifts fault somehow and i wanted to know if we're the only ones

so. basically. since I woke up I've been floating about two feeet off the ground. and i cant get down.

also. my roommate's turned into a cat.

does anyone have any advice

Comments

apparently I should be clarifying these are private texts to Daniel (and cat Seth)

[etherthief]

I'm fine! Greta is beautiful and perfect. I am a little bit in love with her. She's married though. I don't want to rush her. What do you think I should do??

[peacefulexplorer]

[SOMETHING WEIRD IS DEFINITELY HAPPENING HERE]

that certainly sounds like a problem??

honestly Im probably out of my depth here

maybe talk to her about it?

[he is so not qualified for this. when did this go from cats to crushes. oh god help.]

[etherthief]

That is a great idea Daniel. I will definitely talk to Greta about it.

[etherthief]

FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK

[etherthief]

MY PHONE HAS BEEN SENDING THIS SHIT BY ITSELF

[etherthief]

IT JUST SENT SO MANY TEXTS TO HER OH GOD OH GODDDDD FUCK

[etherthief]

I WAS ASLEEP

[peacefulexplorer]

oh god.

okay i figured something was going on

was it just your phone??

[etherthief]

it was just texting BY ITSELF IT'S okay but really I do totally love Greta

[etherthief]

LJAKDFLJFL

[peacefulexplorer]

i think we're all hit by the same thing and it's affecting us differently

I'm floating and seth's a cat and you're

somethingsh appening there too clearly

[etherthief]

my phone is a little shit and has a mind of its own now? and it's TELLING PEOPLE THINGS IT SHOULD NOT BE TELLING THEM? YEAH I'D SAY SOMETHING IS HAPPENING

[peacefulexplorer]

yeah okay thats not good

I'd suggest we meet but i think someone floating throuh Manhattan might draw to much attention

[etherthief]

I can't anyway. I have to get to her place right now. TO TELL HER HOW I FEEEEEL

[etherthief]

NO PHONE YOU LITTLE PIECE OF SHIT YOU ALREADY DID A PRETTY GOOD JOB OF THAT YOU TINY ASSHOLE

[etherthief]

ugh I'm sorry. good luck with your thing.

[peacefulexplorer]

thanks. and you too.

maybe get your phone to someone who can temporarily disable it or something

[etherthief]

the best qualified person for that is literally ME, do you think I didn't try that

[etherthief]

I'm sorry I woke up stressed

[peacefulexplorer]

no I don't blame you

short of drowning it in water I dont know what else might work

[etherthief]

I literally took the battery out and it stayed on. So I don't think that would work either. Super awesome THANKS RIFT

[peacefulexplorer]

damn it. I'll text you if i think of anything else but good luck

[etherthief]

thanks man you're a real pal

[peacefulexplorer]

[No message this time, simply a picture of a brown tabby - apparently Seth - glaring powerfully in the camera's direction.]

[etherthief]

Aw. Wait is that your roommate? Who IS your roommate these days, I'm losing track